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The two church deacons are fretting about a meeting with the church
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DEACON 1
Ah, Sexton, so nice of you to drop by.
GRUB (irritated)
I didn't "drop by," I were told to be here. Now say your say.
DEACON 1 (nervous, clears throat)
Yes, well, as you know, it's customary for the deacons to distribute gifts to the staff at Christmas...
GRUB (excitedly)
You've got some money for me?
DEACON 1 (slowly)
But it is with regret that we must inform you...
DEACON 2 (angrily)
You're not getting any money this year!
(Grub bristles.)
GRUB (angrily)
Hey, what are you trying to pull?! The church baskets have been brimming over of late!
DEACON 1
Money's not the problem.
GRUB (threateningly)
Then what is?!
DEACON 1 (cowed)
The problem, Sexton...
DEACON 2 (pointing to Grub)
Is you!
(Grub bangs fist on table. Deacon 2 yelps, jumps behind Deacon 1.)
GRUB
I'm a
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